How to play
Draft Him is a comedy about the fantasy football curse: the moment you draft a guy, something happens to him. You can’t stop it. You can only decide who it happens to, and how to squeeze a season out of what’s left.
Your first minute
- Press Draft him. In the default style, three prospects walk out, each with a scouting report.
- Pick one. A second later the breaking news hits and you learn what he did. Let it play out. Pressing Draft again skips the scene.
- Find out what happened to the two you passed on. This is usually the worst part.
- Repeat. You get seven picks a week. When they’re used, the week kicks off automatically and your total is compared with your opponent’s.
On a computer, press D to draft and 1, 2 or 3 to pick a prospect. On a phone, just tap. You don’t need an account, and your progress saves by itself. Start playing.
The three draft styles
You can change style at any time with the link under the Draft button. Each style changes how much the rest of the league scores, because when you get to choose, so do they.
| Style | What you get | Rival scoring |
|---|---|---|
| Pick 1 of 3 | Three prospects and scouting reports on every pick | +45% |
| Draft board | Ten players a week to choose from, and rivals snipe the ones you skip | +20% |
| Quick pick | One button. Whoever walks out, walks out | No bonus |
How scoring works
Every prospect has a projection, the number of points he’s supposed to score: around 22 for a quarterback, 17 for a running back, 16 for a receiver, 11 for a tight end and 8 or 9 for a kicker. Then his outcome decides how much of that you actually get.
- Arrested: nothing, unless you’ve hired a bail bondsman, and he’s usually gone for two to six weeks.
- Suspended: nothing, usually for two to six games.
- Injured: nothing most of the time. If he’s only out a week or two, he may give you part of his projection before leaving early.
- Things nobody can explain: your best hope. If it costs him no time he plays nearly as projected, and a short absence still earns garbage-time points.
- Legendary: about one pick in a hundred, a player does something good. These usually score 30% to 90% more than projected.
Your week’s score is simply the total from all your picks, adjusted by any upgrades and that week’s event. Expect small numbers: a typical week is around 11 points before upgrades. Don’t be alarmed.
What clout is
Clout is the game’s currency, and your disasters are how you earn it. Rarer outcomes pay more.
| Event | Clout |
|---|---|
| Common outcome | 3 |
| Uncommon outcome | 8 |
| Rare outcome | 25 |
| Legendary outcome | 100 |
| Win a regular-season week | 15 |
| Win a playoff game | 40 |
| Win the title | 250 |
| Unlock an achievement | 25 |
| Sit through a press conference or a bodycam clip | 10 |
Tap Clout to spend it in the Front Office. The upgrades guide covers what’s worth buying.
Your reputation
Career picks carry over between seasons and earn you a title. After 10, 25 and 50 career picks, stranger outcomes start appearing, so the game gets odder the longer you play.
| Career picks | Title |
|---|---|
| 0 | Hopeful First-Time Manager |
| 10 | Unlucky Manager |
| 25 | Person of Interest |
| 50 | Under Federal Investigation |
| 100 | The Commissioner Fears You |
| 250 | Banned From Three Leagues |
| 500 | Subject of a True-Crime Documentary |
| 1,000 | The Reason the Conduct Policy Exists |
Where to go next
Read the season guide to see what’s coming, or the strategy guide if you’d like to lose more scientifically.